Marriage (go back »)

June 4 2008, 12:57 AM

marriage [side note: this entry is MY opinion, if you dont agree with it then that is ok. but this is what i believe to be truth. I am not here to throw my opinion down anyones throat, nor do i expect to get comments about being narrow-minded] a beautiful union between two people, two souls. A lifetime of happiness, struggle, temptation, memories...etc. I think marriage is going to be wonderful. And no...i am not ignorant to the fact that it will be hard. Marriage in and of itself is made to be beautiful...made to be Holy and made to be firm. However marriage is to be grounded in the love, security, commitment, guidance, and trust of God. I was watching tonight the bachelorette wedding ceremony. And i was saddened that neither one of them knew Jesus as their savior...and that God was only mentioned in the beginning when the pastor said "and before God". -sigh-. I'm not expecting everyone to see things the way i do. But i can honestly say that marriage is SACRED! Most people forget that. sacred |ˈsākrid|:adjective; connected with God or dedicated to a religious purpose and so deserving veneration. Honestly...why do you think so many marriages do not work? Is it because the people rushed into things, is it that they just fight too much, is it that they have 'irreconcilable differences' ??? You know, people can use those excuses all they want. But i truly 100% believe that if a marriage does not work, it is normally not set in the Love of Christ, or the Guidance of Christ. Marriage will truly only work the way it was designed to, and it was designed by God. [side note: i do know of a few instances where the Christians in a marriage did not work. however those situations i am thinking of did not work out because one of the spouses did not believe in Jesus as their personal savior]. Ephesians 5 lays out the scripture of a biblical marriage. It lists the characteristics husbands and wives should have towards each other. "For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the savior.” Ephesians 5: 23. Some people might view this as a load of crock, that wives should not be underneath someone...that they should be treated as an equal..."Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord" Ephesians 5:22. Let me guess, you think i'm some closet little girl who does not believe that i could ever be as good as a man. no, that is not the case--and you are welcome to ask the man who is pursuing me if that is the case, he would agree it is not. What i am saying...is that my husband WILL be the head of me. He will lead over me. He will lead me in the Word, in love, in intimacy, in life. He will come beside me when i am struggling and will wrap me in the guidance of the Lord. Is that a hard thing to understand, no. Is it hard to put into place, sometimes. Pride can get a lot of people in trouble. Pride can sometimes make me feel that i should be above my husband, or at least at the very same level than him. He is no better than me. let me make that clear. My husband will not be this superhero who will put me to shame or even put me beneath him. That is something a lot of people also forget about marriage. IT IS A PARTNERSHIP. You value the other person and are invested in them for life. You listen to them, and earnestly try to accommodate their wishes and desires. But my Husband will be the head of the household, he will value me as well as my opinion. But ultimately both of us will go to the Lord with prayer. We will be guided by him...and my husband will make the final decision, WITH me backing him. no questions asked. Selflessness something i think a lot of people forget about when it comes to marriage. It is no longer about what you want or what is best for you. It is about the compromise and the willingness to think of the other person, to put their feelings, wants, desires, best interest first. It is about guarding their heart and seeking to encourage them. It has nothing to do with just you. It is now 'we'. “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In the same way Husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.” –Ephesians 5: 25-28 My Husband is to love me as Christ loves the church. Do you know what kind of love that is??? Unconditional, Unwavering, Unquestioning, Undying, Never abandoning, Always pursuing LOVE. He is to lead me in the footsteps of the Lord. He is to grow with me through God's Word. He is to pursue me passionately and forever. And i am to come to him pure, with a heart open for only him. He is to love me as he loves himself. That verse knocks the wind out of me. When i think about it..."Husbands out to love their wives as they love their own bodies". Again, SELFLESSNESS. . . . Something else i think people so often forget throughout their lives yet is the most important part of a wedding ceremony. The Vows. a sacred vow. i think most people forget the definition of the word vow. Vow:(vo̵u)-noun; -a solemn promise or pledge, esp. one made to God, dedicating oneself to an act, service, or way of life -a solemn promise of love and fidelity marriage vows -a solemn affirmation or assertion Do you know what that means? THAT IS A LIFETIME COMMITMENT! ...'a way of life'. That is not something that says...when things get tough you run and hide, when it just gets too complicated you cut the cord. When it just isn't working for you anymore you divorce them. WHAT? no. It means, when things get tough you get on your knees together and pray for guidance. When it just gets too complicated you help iron things out and ask the Lord for patience, love, encouragement, and guidance. When it just isn't working you do everything to make it work, Prayer, Counseling, etc...you do not give up. PERIOD. You made a lifelong vow to that person, you are theirs and they are yours. Marriage was never meant to be disregarded the way it was now. It is given to us from God to be a sacred, holy, special, beautiful lifelong act of commitment and love from one person to the other. . . . I will have a biblical marriage some day...i will not be another statistic. GOD will be our foundation. Our breathe of life. Our guiding light. Our strength. Our reminder. My marriage will be good, full of love, full of testing moments, full of temptation, full of fire, full of refining moments and last but most importantly...FULL of the LORD.

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